NF – Why lyrics

I know I like to preach to always be yourself (yeah)
But my emotions make me feel like I am someone else
Me and pride had made a pact that we don’t need no help
Which feels like I’m at war inside myself but I forgot the shells
I hold my issues up for all to see, like show and tell
A lot of people know me, but, not a lot know me well
Hold my issues up for all to see, like show and tell
A lot of people know me, but, they don’t know me well
[Outro]
Too many faces, too many faces, too many faces (ayy!)
Stop askin’ me questions, I just wanna feel alive
Until I die—this isn’t Nate’s flow (woo!)
Just let me rhyme; I’m in disguise
I’m a busy person, got no time for lies; one of a kind
They don’t see it; I pull out they eyes; I’m on the rise! I don’t understand, it’s got me questionin’ like, “Why? Just tell me why”—not back to this flow
Inside I feel divided
Back when I ain’t had a dime, but had the drive
Back before I ever signed, I questioned life, like, “Who am I, man?” Woo! I don’t know! Don’t think I deserve it? (ayy!)
I keep to myself, they think I’m sorta shy, organized
Let You Down’s the only song you’ve heard of? I’ve been doin’ this for most my life with no advice (woo!)
Take my chances, I just roll the dice, do what I like
As a kid, I was afraid of heights, put that aside
Now I’m here and they look so surprised, well so am I, woo! (ayy!)
I don’t trust the thoughts that come inside my head (woo!)
I don’t trust this thing that beats inside my chest
Who I am and who I wanna be can not connect; why? (woo!)
That makes me feel weak and so uncomfortable; why? [Intro]
Too many faces, too many faces, too many faces
[Verse 1]
Yeah, what’s your definition of success? [Verse 2]
They don’t invite me to the parties but I still arrive
Kick down the door and then I go inside
Give off that “I do not belong here” vibe
Then take the keys right off the counter, let’s go for a ride
Why do y’all look mortified? (woo!)
I don’t want no one to know I’m vulnerable; why? Well then you’re behind (woo!)
Story time; wish that I could think like Big Sean does, but I just can’t decide (aah!)
If I should stick my knife inside of Pennywise
[Chorus]
I, I don’t care what anybody else thinks—lies (haha!)
I do not need nobody to help me—lies
I kinda feel guilty ’cause I’m wealthy; why? [Chorus]
I push away the people that I love the most; why? Ayy, yeah
Why you always lookin’ aggravated? You get no respect (woo!)
I just made a couple mil’, still not impressed
Let You Down goes triple platinum, yeah, okay, okay, I guess (ayy!)
Smile for a moment then these questions startin’ to fill my head, not again! Not a choice, you know I had to make it
When they talk about the greatest, they gon’ probably never put us in the conversation
Like somethin’ then I gotta take it
Write somethin’ then I might erase it
I love it, then I really hate it
What’s the problem, Nathan? [Verse 3]
Nothin’ to me’s ever good enough
I could be workin’ for twenty-four hours a day and think I never did enough
My life is a movie but there ain’t no tellin’ what you’re gonna see in my cinema (no!)
I wanna be great but I get it in the way of myself and I think about everything that I could never be
Why do I do it though?

Bruce Springsteen – American Land Lyrics

[Verse 1]
What is this land America so many travel there
I’m going now while I’m still young my darling meet me there
Wish me luck my lovely I’ll send for you when I can
And we’ll make our home in the American land
Over there all the woman wear silk and satin to their knees
And children dear, the sweets, I hear, are growing on the trees
Gold comes rushing out the rivers straight into your hands
When you make your home in the American Land
[Chorus]
There’s diamonds in the sidewalk the’s gutters lined in song
Dear I hear that beer flows through the faucets all night long
There’s treasure for the taking, for any hard working man
Who will make his home in the American Land
[Verse 2]
I docked at Ellis Island in a city of light and spires
She met me in the valley of red-hot steel and fire
We made the steel that built the cities with our sweat and two hands
And we made our home in the American Land
[Chorus]
[Verse 3]
The McNicholas, the Polanski’s, the Smiths, Zerillis, too
The Blacks, the Irish, Italians, the Germans and the Jews
Come across the water a thousand miles from home
With nothing in their bellies but the fire down below
They died building the railroads worked to bones and skin
They died in the fields and factories names scattered in the wind
They died to get here a hundred years ago they’re still dying now
The hands that built the country were always trying to keep down
[Chorus]

Just a Dad: Widower’s blog maps a journey from grief to inspiration

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Melbourne 3000
ABC Radio Melbourne

By Nicole Mills

Updated

June 19, 2018 09:28:49

Photo:
Chris Martin, author of Just a Dad, with his children Albi and Grace. (Supplied: Chris Martin)
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Trying to be a mum, trying to be a dad at the same time, and also trying to process your own feelings and emotions,” he said.”It’s a daily struggle for me to try and wear both hats and recognise which one I should be at the right time.”I obviously miss a lot, well, nearly everything to do with having Renee in my life.”I miss the companionship, the shared load, the daily debrief. “Women are really good at regular connection and networking and leaning on their friends for help, whereas guys, whether it’s harking back to the stereotypical tough Aussie male, we don’t tend to reach out and pick up the phone and tell people we’re not feeling well,” he said.”We feel this innate need to just power on and be tough and I think that’s one of the biggest problems with men’s mental health in this country.”That’s why I go public with my journey.” “At the tender age of six it’s not something you contemplate.”
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Facebook post: Mummy's first cuddle
Renee was pregnant with the couple’s second child, Albi, when she received the diagnosis.Albi was two when his mum died and hadn’t had time to form many memories of Renee. “Your whole lifestyle changes, your identity changes, you lose the identity you created in your work environment and then you’ve got to swap to be the mum.”He said one of the hardest things was creating a home for his children without his wife.”As a man I’m good at building stuff, I’m good at building houses, but I’m not good at building a home,” he said.”I found it hard to recreate that environment as a man. I did it as best I could, as we all do, we’ve still got to get up the next day regardless of our grief and our losses.”

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Mr Martin started the Just a Dad blog to share his experiences with grief and parenting. “Luckily for us it was a long journey through cancer and I think maybe subconsciously [the kids] got an idea of how things were tracking,” he said. “It’s that whole journey of grief. Those little moments in life are the things you tend not to think about but they’re the things you miss the most.”What started as a cathartic experience and a way to keep his friends and family informed, quickly grew into something much more inspiring when he started receiving messages from men in similar situations.”They were patting me on the back and saying, ‘Really well done for this, there’s not enough of this out there for guys speaking about loss, about grief, about raising kids’,” Mr Martin said.”It’s just been a really inspiring journey so far to share what I do.”While he has received a lot of support from his online audience, Mr Martin said it was his children who provided the greatest source of strength. In it he shares his experience as a grieving widower and a single parent struggling to be both mum and dad. (Supplied: Chris Martin)
The biggest lessons Grace and Albi taught him were not to focus too much on the future.”Kids live so much in the present, they deal with emotions and thoughts and everything in the moment, and unless it’s going to affect them in the next two hours or two days it’s sort of dealt with in a few minutes and then on to the next thing,” he said. “He’s coming to all that now which is really nice to see,” Mr Martin said.”He wants to watch videos and see photos of his mum and have conversations about happy times.”Baring his soul online in Just a Dad blogTo help him cope with the tumultuous time after his wife’s death, Mr Martin started the Just a Dad blog. (Supplied: Chris Martin)
Another listener, Barry, became a widower almost a decade ago when his children were in secondary school.His advice to other men going through the same experience was to find someone to confide in.”I know what kept me going was I’ve got one mate in particular and I know I can hop on the phone to him when I’ve been feeling down, when things haven’t been going well,” he said.”You just need that one connection with just one person.”Letting men know it’s OK to reach out for helpMr Martin is trying to share that same message through his blog, encouraging other widowers not to hide their pain. “I was a bit put off at the start, and as time has gone on since we lost Renee these two kids have taught me so much about living in the now and not worrying about the what ifs and what could bes.”Widowers share their advice and painABC Radio Melbourne listener Ward phoned in to share his story about losing his wife in 2001 when his two children were eight and 10. “To be honest, if it hadn’t have been for the kids, I don’t know where I’d be at this stage. When we lose our wives, I found, and I think it would be the same with a lot of men, we lose our identity as well,” he said.”I was running a business as a tradesman so the whole lot stops to look after your kids. They really helped me through the whole thing.”

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Chris Martin took Albi and Grace to the same restaurant where he and their mother got engaged. But eventually they had to have a heartbreaking conversation with their then-six-year-old.”I remember the day telling Grace that we didn’t know whether we were going to be able to beat the germs in mum’s belly, and if we couldn’t that meant that mummy’s body wouldn’t be able to live anymore and she’d die,” Mr Martin told ABC Radio Melbourne’s Libbi Gorr.”That was full-on, as you can imagine, having to tell that to a six-year-old girl and the look of disbelief and non-understanding in her eyes. How do you tell a child their mother is dying?It’s a question Chris Martin had to confront when his late wife Renee was diagnosed with incurable kidney cancer.The couple decided not to use the term cancer to describe Renee’s illness in order to shield their daughter from other people’s tales of cancer and loss.Instead they referred to the disease as “the germs in mum’s belly”. “One word that has stuck with me is loss.
How I prepared my son for the death of his mum
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Players with intellectual disabilities ‘pumped’ for inclusive footy carnival

Tasmanian players get ready for AFL Inclusion Carnival
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AFL hopefuls show off their skills at Darwin talent ID day
ABC Radio Sydney

By

Luke Wong

Posted

June 19, 2018 11:21:27

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The AFL Inclusion Carnival brings together players living with an intellectual disability. (ABC Radio Sydney: Luke Wong)
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Sydney 2000
“I started to get pumped,” he said.The young man from Picton will be wearing the number 6 guernsey when he runs onto the field to represent NSW/ACT during his first AFL Inclusion Carnival. Photo:
Dylan Donaldson is proud to be representing NSW/ACT in the AFL Inclusion Carnival for the second time. (ABC Radio Sydney: Luke Wong)
Fostering communityAFL community football manager Jacinta Huston said the event encouraged teamwork among players who originated from distant locations from around NSW and the ACT.”We’ve got the aim for the AFL to be a more inclusive sport, and it’s just really important to get the boys involved and give them an opportunity to showcase their amazing skills,” she said.”They’re no different to anybody else.” Photo:
Taylor Hanson will make his Aussie Rules debut at the AFL Inclusion Carnival. (Supplied: AFL)
Now in its fifth year, the event is for male players over the age of 16 who are living with an intellectual disability.Jumping between codesA convert from rugby league, Taylor quickly got up to speed on Aussie Rules after receiving a call from the Down Syndrome Association inviting him to attend a training session.The keen Sydney Swans fan is aiming to kick at least eight goals during this year’s event in Launceston.”Being in a team is probably the biggest thing for him; he really likes being among people that he can associate with,” his father Greg said.”To him it’s just everything, he’s just looking forward to it so much.”He wasn’t an AFL supporter before this but now we have to watch all the games, so it’s good.” ‘Owning’ a disabilityTeam-mate Dylan Donaldson is eager to return to the field after his team’s impressive performance during last year’s carnival on the Gold Coast. (ABC Radio Sydney: Luke Wong)
“It’s was pretty good but sadly I couldn’t play after the first game of the lightning round,” he said.Dylan’s cheek bears a scar from an injury he sustained after a collision with another player.”He got knocked out and I ended up with six stitches,” he said. For Taylor Hanson, being chosen to represent his state in a national AFL competition offered him a rare opportunity to travel interstate and show off his kicking abilities. (Supplied: AFL)
Dylan enjoys playing forward positions and said he would use skills from his other sporting activities to get an advantage over opponents.”From league I’ll be able to bring my tackling and my speed, as well as footwork,” he said.”[From] cricket would be my ability to jump high and be able to catch.”As one of six students from Doonside Technology High School to make the team, the proud western Sydney resident is also hoping to experience some novel weather during his first visit to the country’s most southerly state.”I’ve never seen snow, so fingers crossed I get to see snow in Launceston.”I’m [glad] that this year’s guernseys have long sleeves.”

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The NSW Government gave funding to allow 16 players to travel and participate in the event for free. Although NSW/ACT were defeated in the grand final by reigning champions Victoria Metro, Dylan is optimistic his team can reverse the result.”Owning my disability is a big honour and I’m proud to be going for the second year.”

Photo:
Teams undertake last-minute training for the 10 matches they will play over the five-day tournament.